Poop jokes

Have you ever held a poo back before a climb and farted during the crux to boost you through the moves?... i swear by this tchnique it works every time, except that on time i had diarrea and shit on my belayer lol

Farting is aid

Kevin Shoemaker wrote: Have you ever held a poo back before a climb and farted during the crux to boost you through the moves?... i swear by this tchnique it works every time, except that on time i had diarrea and shit on my belayer lol

Pretty sure that qualifies as aid. The only way to really climb is to do ground-up onsight barefoot naked free solo. If you aren't doing that, don't kid yourself that you're really climbing.

Last year when traveling from Seattle to Mount Hood for a 2 day ascent, I got stuck in traffic and decided to skip my grocery store run and go with McDonalds drive through. I got 10 breakfast burritos to eat over the next couple days. They gave me wild sticky orange goopy poop about 4 hours into the climb. That’s all I had to eat though, so I kept on eating them. The poop kept on coming every few hours. Many buffs died over those two days.

I also lost an ice tool in the midst of pooping. My biggest worry about losing the tool was being more likely to slip, which would certainly result in me pooping myself. You can see my shame immortalized in a lost gear thread here.

Its atleast a A4 move i mean if i dont fart hard emough i dont make it...
Damn Chris C. That is a hardcore diet im impressed you lived though that shit lol

Kevin Shoemaker wrote: Damn Chris C. That is a hardcore diet im impressed you lived though that shit lol

'Tis the alpine, my friend