Taken outside, near the grassy banks of a small river, on a glorious spring day, with plenty of butter and raspberry jam, few things in life are nicer than tea and crumpets. Congruently, there are few boulder problems on the Carderock schist that can compare to the delight that is known as Tea and Scrumpet. Yet, what – you may ask – is a scrumpet? The Oxford English Dictionary defines it as "an elegantly awkward rock climbing move executed with one's genetalia an uncomfortably short distance from the rock."
This route traverses (left to right) from the front side of X-face, past Buckets of Blood Arete and onto the back wall with one important rule: you are not allowed to use any holds on or above the one inch roof on the Impossible Face (the face just left of Buckets of Blood Arete, shown in the center of the beta photo). The crux is the "scrump" move: getting both hands established on the arete. Kicking a foot across to the back wall is a harsh test of groin flexibility and may require substantial pre-game stretching.
A bouldering mat placed near the arete saves the butt from damage, but is considered by many to be "unsporting."
Getting intimate with the rock while executing the...
|By dwight grupp|
From: Almont, Colorado
Mar 2, 2009
Hello, I grew up going to Rock State Park. It sure is nice to see pictures of the area here on Mtn. Project..On the south side there is a great 5'7/5'8 50' climb. I had to solo it, it was great, no one was there, good time to reflect. I've been living in Colorado near a little canyon called Taylor Canyon, Harmels Rock Climbing. Check it out. And the Black Canyon is an hr away, intimidating to say the leaste, anyways being a forest hill native, it all started there for me. Cheers.
|By Dan Hickstein|
Jun 9, 2009
Rick, I'm not sure if it was done in the 80's: the route requires that the climber squash their genitals against the sharp arete, a technique that was not invented until 1998.
|By Ralph Kolva|
From: Evergreen, CO
Mar 19, 2010
I recall Geoff Farrar busting my chops on this problem in at least 83 or 84, we did a variation that uses a sit start at the bottom of BOB and finished by baling near the top of X- face or finishing Impossible. As Rickd said, there were plenty of people climbing harder than me and doing this problem. Given the number of years people have been climbing at Carderock and the amount of eliminations I saw during 2 decades I would be surprised if there is anything that hasn't been done before. You could always check with John Gregory, he's a walking encyclopedia of climbing routes and knowledge particularly in the Mid-Atlantic region.
|By Gee Double|
May 13, 2013
many, many ascents prior to 1976 and many more since...
similar in quality to the east facing traverse west of T.B. Boulder/Stannard's Playground. 200 m WSW
|By Paul Hess|
Jan 16, 2014
Thanks Dan. Real glad you still enjoy that problem. For the doubters, I did research with the old(-er) guard, including Geoff (RIP...) and John, and this line was new. It was also damned hard to figure out to make it a reality. Started out as "Implausible", but renamed to account for the need for scrumping, which seemed to be key beta, and fun too for those of us into such things.