Ok...
So I need opinions-I am getting married in June and just got back from Moab. Now I have helped with Wedding planning, done my chores, etc.

I was wondering how reasonable it is for my future bride to ask me to lay off climbing for the month surrounding the wedding because it would stress her even more out.

Is this reasonable? I don't get injured a ton and was curious how you all would take it... Should I say the hell with it and plan to climb (just a day trip or two) inside that window anyways?

I would like your feedback!

Thanks.

Keep climbing

weddings are stupid, get married at the courthouse. she should be out roping up with you.

The poster above me has the truth of it, though it's an irrelevant truth, depending. But I can tell you, if I could do it over again, I would have done the whole marriage thing differently. Would have been justice-of-the-peace, and she would have known she was marrying a climber, and that wasn't going to change.

Does she know she's marrying a climber, and that isn't going to change? You better make damn sure there's no misunderstandings there...

This is the subtle control that only gets worse.

@The Larry +1

Totally unreasonable request.

My wife was super hot, when prior to the wedding I had to cancel our honeymoon because I drew a late season elk tag that would require all three weeks of my vacation at the time. She got over it.
(And yes we are still married, 10 years later.)

No way. You're never going to be able to get away with potentially stressing her out over hypothetical negatives, so why even attempt it? It's her special day and that means at least 1 more month of ensuring your future master, I mean partner, gets what she deserves. Stay home, call the caterer, play the role, say your lines, use your registry at Furniture Row to get the Cloud Power Recliner (www.furniturerow.com/SofaMart/The-Cloud-Sofa-Group/The-Cloud>>>, although be sure to check with her on color so it doesn't distract from the floral ottomans her Mom bought for your suburban starter-home), relax, and watch Payton Manning get paid Bahzillions to do what he loves to do while you drown your angst at not being able to do what you love to do in copious amounts of Michelob Ultra ('cause she'll be pissed if you can't fit into your Men's Wearhouse Komfort Khakis to go to her sister's graduation from culinary school).

Just kidding. Go climbing man!

I wonder what she will tell you after your first kid? Every climbing friend of mine who got married became less and less of a climber as time went on. Basically what everyones telling you is your climbing days are limited. Sounds like your not even married yet, and already she's weeding out the climber in you. I'm not saying not to get married but she has to except you for who you are.
+1 to Ben B.

A whole month? That's asking way too much.

Says the single climbers who all struggle with relationships because climbing takes priority...

Hell no! Sack up, stand your ground, and keep climbing!!!

You already know what you are going to do...so if this is for fun make sure she does not see it haha! Picture of your wife-to-be please???????

Needless to say I drank a little and made her sign something stating this is the only time she is able to ask me not to climb for an agreed amount of time... Any other time is nullified unless she is in the hospital.

No we compromised to two and a half weeks before... She knows who she is marrying... I guess its ok for now-until I start pm-ing/posting people two weeks prior who I don't know to go climb with me for a quick climb or two nearby. If they don't know me they cant tell on me.

On a more serious note; this website keeps me sane.

Voices of experience:

"Does she know she's marrying a climber, and that isn't going to change? You better make damn sure there's no misunderstandings there..."

"This is the subtle control that only gets worse."

"Sounds like your not even married yet, and already she's weeding out the climber in you. I'm not saying not to get married but she has to except you for who you are."

This is not about the actual wedding.. . . . Let the tug of war begin!

Women marry men believing that they can change them.
Men marry women thinking they won't change.
Both are typically disappointed in those regards.

My two cents....

go back to Moab

If I had it to do all over again, I would climb whenever I wanted, and get some strange once in a while; instead of the opposite. Now I have a chick around all the time, but have to fit climbing in once in a while. Unless you marry an avid female climber that is AS OBSESSED OR MORE as you are with climbing, you WILL climb less. Probably a lot less. Any notion other than this one is fantasy.

I'm in the middle of four very large projects around the house.
It was understood when we BEGAN our relationship that (aside from cherishing her) climbing IS my main focus.

That being said, the projects get held off another day when a partner & I get excited about something and they get held off even longer when I want to travel for a long weekend of craging.

It's hard to walk away from the projects (she lives in the mess too), but I'm only going to live once and I MUST have no regrets. The (now) wife completely understands & is very supportive.

The projects can wait when I'm having fun.

Back to to OP question. Let me start with a fun quote:
"Wow, this all really came together" on our wedding night when I had the time of my life. I had no idea what the wedding day would be like because I did ZERO planning or work to pull it together. She thought is was freeking hilarious when I said that 'it all just came together'.

Don't sacrifice your dreams; long story short.

You should have her read this thread.

1+ for Delta Bravo's comment.

1) Don't do or be anything now that you are not willing to do or be later.
2) Talk this through and be honest. All relationships have their foundations in communication and trust. Once one of those is gone, the relationship is over.
3) If what we think is more important than how she feels... as in you intend to argue your point with her about this using these results... you've already lost.