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By Zappatista
May 18, 2010
Book me, officer.

I'm new to climbing. Can anyone tell me if chalk is just a total pussy move or if it's really, really cool and necessary, like if chalk ceased to exist, would climbing just STOP?

Thanks for the reading list. Sometime when I'm not busy burning Randy Leavitt in effigy, I'll get around to the amusing tale of how I had to threaten one of the mormon bishops up in St. George with a beatdown to get him to stop spying on a nude hottub party at my homegirl's house. Apparently, in St. George, it is considered bad form to tell a member of the ruling aristocracy to get of the bushes and back to his house before he and I had to have an unpleasant conversation that would end in dismemberment, disembowelment, or just getting dissed, or all three. He was still ogling as he walked away...backwards.

I always respect a man of God.


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By J. Albers
From Colorado
May 18, 2010
Bucky

This thread just keeps on giving....

In particular, the Reverend Ripped is a f'ing riot....Testify!!!


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By Frank Derabid
May 18, 2010

I have heard many things about Mountain Project, but only now have I seen it for myself. I have looked at many pages and see that it is a very useful site for learning about climbing routes. It is also very good for finding partners I think, but I have never used it for that.

I see that there are 'trolls' here and I think that they are just a nuisance for everyone here who is very serious about rock climbing. I think they should just not waist our time anymore and they should find better things to do with their time!


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By Lee Smith
May 18, 2010
You can love your rope but you can't "LOVE" your rope! <br />(Back by Popular Demand.  There you are Mom) <br /> <br />

Killis Howard wrote:
I'm new to climbing. Can anyone tell me if chalk is just a total pussy move or if it's really, really cool and necessary, like if chalk ceased to exist, would climbing just STOP?

Course not. Haven't you ever heard of Jim Erickson?

J. Albers wrote:
This thread just keeps on giving.... In particular, the Reverend Ripped is a f'ing riot....Testify!!!


I agree. Rip-o-matic is far more entertaining than the little wanker troll that started this thread, and continues to unimaginatively follow troll-101 basics without any inspiration. What a fekkin' amatuer.


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By Lee Smith
May 18, 2010
You can love your rope but you can't "LOVE" your rope! <br />(Back by Popular Demand.  There you are Mom) <br /> <br />

johnL wrote:
Conan the Riparian....Ripsputin....Ripolian Bone a part.


Jesus, John, I just snorked a half chug of PBR through my nose. Good on yer, Man!

Yeah, PBR....I still don't have a job and money is tight. I am saving up to buy a sixer of Pilsner Urquell this weekend!


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By Buff Johnson
May 18, 2010
smiley face

Ripplestiltskin
Ripplemintz
Rippleforeskin
RipmeanewonecauseimatotaldumbassthatcantclimbrockoriceforshitbutilookrealcooleventhoughmybodyisgonnaexplodefromthatbeestingbutitdontmattercausejohnLisnowherenearascoolasmeAmericalovesMElookatmeAmericaLOOKATME


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By J. Albers
From Colorado
May 19, 2010
Bucky

Lee Smith wrote:
... Yeah, PBR....I still don't have a job and money is tight. I am saving up to buy a sixer of Pilsner Urquell this weekend!


Hey now!! Watch yer mouth about the PBR!!! Now, I know that some of you Boulderites think its trendy to slum and drink PBR down on Pearl Street, but some of us grew up in good 'ol Wisco where our dads and uncles drank PBR and Old Style by choice....and we happen to think that PBR is a fine, fine beer!!! Much better than that high brow Czech stuff anyway....

Then again, I bet Ripped doesn't have time for PBR....he probably drinks an extreme combo of beer and Rockstar, eh?


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By John Maguire
From Boulder, CO
May 19, 2010
Bastille Crack Final Pitch

J. Albers wrote:
Hey now!! Watch yer mouth about the PBR!!! Now, I know that some of you Boulderites think its trendy to slum and drink PBR down on Pearl Street, but some of us grew up in good 'ol Wisco where our dads and uncles drank PBR and Old Style by choice....and we happen to think that PBR is a fine, fine beer!!! Much better than that high brow Czech stuff anyway.... Then again, I bet Ripped doesn't have time for PBR....he probably drinks an extreme combo of beer and Rockstar, eh?


Drink PBR - Save America


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By P LaDouche
From CO
May 19, 2010

Lee Smith wrote:
Rip-o-matic is far more entertaining than the little wanker troll that started this thread, and continues to unimaginatively follow troll-101 basics without any inspiration. What a fekkin' amatuer.


Now now Leeroy, can we leave the personal attacks to RC.com? Besides, if this thread was a troll then why do so many of you bother reading/posting on it? The fact that so many(whiners) did either makes you a troll also or just a sucker. I think its neither since this is a legit thread.

So I'm working on a cute avatar photo for myself, anyone got any ideas?


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By Christopher Jones
From Denver, Colorado
May 19, 2010
Climbing So Wild at Thunder Ridge photo by Kevin McLaughlin.

Helping to save America!

You can't climb all the time.
You can't climb all the time.


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By P LaDouche
From CO
May 19, 2010

I do have to say there are some angry people out there, homophobic too. I would share some of the PMs I've been getting but they are Private Messages for a reason eh? Here is a video that might explain what I'm talking about-

www.funnyordie.com/videos/36d31abcf2/will-ferrell-answers-in>>>


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By Legs Magillicutty
From Littleton
May 19, 2010
Function over fashion.  My newest pair of climbing shoes.

Good job Chris! Keep up the good work. :-)


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By Lee Smith
May 19, 2010
You can love your rope but you can't "LOVE" your rope! <br />(Back by Popular Demand.  There you are Mom) <br /> <br />

P LaDouche wrote:
So I'm working on a cute avatar photo for myself, anyone got any ideas?


How's 'bout a picture of you in a dark room lit only by your computer screen, feverishly masturbating with one hand while you type with the other; making little Beavis & Butthead "he-he" noises as you congratulate yourself on the excellent "legit" thread you started that is so amatuerly and obviously a troll as to insult the intelligence of any thinking person.

Then get butthurt, claim it isn't a troll, come back with more troll, get butthurt, come back with personal attacks, claim it isn't a troll, get butthurt, claim you don't mock Noobs and then continue to mock them in every post, butthurt....not a troll....rookie.


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By P LaDouche
From CO
May 19, 2010

Lee Smith wrote:
How's 'bout a picture of you in a dark room lit only by your computer screen, feverishly masturbating with one hand while you type with the other


I dont think Mrs LaDouche would like that too much Lee, quite the imagination you have though. Remind me to never climb with that rope...


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By camhead
From Vandalia, Appalachia
May 19, 2010
You stay away from mah pig!

spencerparkin wrote:
BTW, I want to say for the record that the acqusations made against Joseph Smith on this thread are false. I'm not trying to start a religious debate nor am I going participate in one.


But, but, but... I just saw this thread! I want to bash teh Mormons! White and Delightsome! Pay Lay Ale! Mark of Cain! Adam-God doctrine! Mahonri Moriancamer! I don't know that we teach that anymore!

Oh, and for as n00btastic as rc.knob is, thanks to the good efforts of people like jt512, caughtinside, snoppy, and myself, we have MUCH less tolerance for noobs than this place does.

People who post up on rc asking about the difference between a sport redpoint and sport pinkpoint are going to get smacked down and made to feel like the fuckwits that they are. Here you just bob their knobs.

See my "don't be a jerk" thread for more details.


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By Ripped
From No Fear, CO
May 19, 2010
God, I have preety muscles.

johnL wrote:
Conan the Riparian (you can have that one). I'm in my underwear right now closely studying your profile picture. I'm confused because I'm gazing at your massive quads (quadzilla really) and I can't really understand how you got your man thong on. So Ripsputin (that's you too), my question really is, how much can spandex give before it won't rebound? Thanks. PS, Ripolian Bone a part.


The Ripmaster General is glad the you have been enjoying his herculean visage while partially nude. Your query about Quadzilla is a valid one. It is true that the Ripped One tears through man-panties like the Douchematic One tears through N00bs. I have since started using body paint to cover my roid-shriveled man hood.
Ripper Gore thanks you for all of the name suggestions. One must always have an extreme name when talking to the ladies.


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By Ripped
From No Fear, CO
May 19, 2010
God, I have preety muscles.

J. Albers wrote:
Then again, I bet Ripped doesn't have time for PBR....he probably drinks an extreme combo of beer and Rockstar, eh?

Ripped Van Winkle thinks that Rockstar is for N00bs. He will only use Powerthirst to wash down his creatine.


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By Finn the Human
From The Land of Ooo
May 19, 2010
Mathematical!

Ripped wrote:
Ripped Van Winkle thinks that Rockstar is for N00bs. He will only use Powerthirst to wash down his creatine.


Baron von Rip, why didn't you ever tell us you were the official sponsor of such an extreme beverage? That is so extreme! I bet you get lots of ladies. I only wish I could be as rad as you. You're like the anti-wimploserweakling. Keep up the awesomeness!


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By Darrell Bruder
From Steamboat Spring, CO
May 19, 2010

There's a lot of talk on this site about anything but climbing, and a lot of whining. Does anyone actualy climb, report on conditions and climbing, or does everyone have an attitude? I remember the French guy climbing in the states for a month, looking for a partner, and some of the smart remarks made. Most people are idiots, aren't they?


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By P LaDouche
From CO
May 19, 2010

Ya know, there was one thing about Misty(of misty&Killis) that I liked in one of her numerous internet promotions of herself and that is she used the word "butthurt" quite a bit.

Why are people butthurt so easily? We all(mostly) do some crazed shit sometimes on the rock, things that 99.9% of the population would never even consider doing and yet the some of the same people get all bent out of shape over some words...

Now, can anyone tell me how to build a platform in the back of my truck? Do I need to buy some tools?


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By Finn the Human
From The Land of Ooo
May 19, 2010
Mathematical!

P LaDouche wrote:
Now, can anyone tell me how to build a platform in the back of my truck? Do I need to buy some tools?


No tools needed... if you are a real hardcore climber, that is. Just use your crazy strong forearm muscles to tighten any nuts or screws. It's all about crimp power! I always take off my shirt before working anywhere on a car though. Don't want to get any dirt/grease/oil on my pink, striped, Abercrombie shirt!

And here's a little tip for you: climber's urine can be used as a viable replacement for gasoline. But it only works if you are a real climber, like MC Ripper.


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By Brett B.
May 19, 2010
Yo

I bet the Ripped master general would just pound the screws in with his palm. Silly P La Troll climbers don't drive trucks they drive Subarus.


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By Tim Hudgel
May 19, 2010

"Conditions at Lumpy??" From Ft. Collins........WTF.

We're all doomed.


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By Lee Smith
May 19, 2010
You can love your rope but you can't "LOVE" your rope! <br />(Back by Popular Demand.  There you are Mom) <br /> <br />

P LaDouche wrote:
I dont think Mrs LaDouche would like that too much Lee, quite the imagination you have though. Remind me to never climb with that rope...


I do have some imagination Mr. LaDouche; quite a refreshing difference from your boring formula trolling and sophomoric humor.

Yawn.... It is past my bedtime and except for the extemporaneous wit from the Rip-asuarus Rex and his cohorts, this thread is officially boring me. Thanks for the troll Mr. LaDouche, even though it was fairly mediocre. I'm out.

PS I think it is time to retire my rope. It's pretty filthy.


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By MJMobes
From The land of steady habits
Oct 29, 2012
modern man

hey look what I found during the "storm of the century"

whatever happened to P?


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