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Pnelson
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Apr 10, 2015
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Unknown Hometown
· Joined Jan 2015
· Points: 635
Ok, I just saw a comment in another thread about disposing of gear, in which someone said, "yeah, send it to me for proper disposal." Yawn. So, what are some of the most used-up, tired, lame, and notfunny climbing jokes, cliches, and sayings?
-It's probably ok, but is your life worth more than $50? -The best climber is the one having the most fun! -I'd take a bomber nut over a sketchy cam any day! -I'm getting back into it -hey, can you [insert mooching favor here]? I'll repay you with beer and karma! -Yer gonna die! -Huh huh, I love to place NUTS in CRACKS. Get it? Big jugs! -At the Gunks this would be... -This is a troll, but assuming it's not, here's my statement -This is Elanor,but assuming it's not, here's my statement -Yeah, Ondra's ok, but he's no Sharma! -Tall people can climb hard, look at Dean Potter! -Short people can climb hard, look at Lynn Hill! -Women can climb hard, look at Lynn Hill! -Don't forget to check your knot, look at Lynn Hill!
Any more YAWN-worthy cliches? Post up!
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Trad Princess
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Apr 10, 2015
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Not That Into Climbing
· Joined Jan 2012
· Points: 1,175
Fantastic OP. I give it 9/10.
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FrankPS
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Apr 10, 2015
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Atascadero, CA
· Joined Nov 2009
· Points: 276
All the excuses why I couldn't send that climb: - I need to lose weight (true)
- That type of climbing isn't my strong suit (true for any "type" for me)
- It's a high-gravity day (every day is for me)
- My belayer didn't give me confidence
- I had the wrong shoes on for this climb
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Sam Stephens
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Apr 10, 2015
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PORTLAND, OR
· Joined Jan 2010
· Points: 1,090
You can't use a grigri for xxxx rope diameter! I sent my project to the crux You can't use a grigri for trad! Clipping prehung draws is not a real red point You have to use a cord and ultra equalize your anchor, which must be at least three points and an uplift piece. If you're going to bolt do it right the first time and use titanium glue ins so they last a million years You must use a torque wrench when you bolt Sport climbing is neither Bouldering isn't real climbing Bouldering is just a party trick Bouldering is practice climbing Trad is for old fat guys If there's a bolt it's not trad Bolts don't mean it's a sport route
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Forest Wizard
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Apr 10, 2015
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Fayetteville, NC
· Joined Jan 2015
· Points: 5
1. "Climbing is all about leg strength." 2. "Yea, I climbed that (insert grade) the other day. To me, I think it's more of a (insert lower grade)". 3. "There's just too many people climbing these days!"
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saxfiend
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Apr 10, 2015
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Decatur, GA
· Joined Nov 2006
· Points: 4,221
"If you have to ask, you shouldn't be [blah blah blah]." JL
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Eric Engberg
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Apr 10, 2015
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Unknown Hometown
· Joined Apr 2009
· Points: 0
"practice falls". More of an oxy-moron. Warrior's Way.
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john strand
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Apr 10, 2015
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southern colo
· Joined May 2008
· Points: 1,640
"this would be a better climb with more bolts" bull Shit
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Bill C.
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Apr 10, 2015
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Fort Collins, CO
· Joined Jul 2008
· Points: 110
Any time anyone asks a question about anything at all, no matter how simple of a question: MP response: "Do yourself a favor and hire a guide"
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nathanael
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Apr 10, 2015
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Riverside, CA
· Joined May 2011
· Points: 525
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Justin Brunson
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Apr 10, 2015
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Tacoma WA
· Joined Jun 2010
· Points: 2,266
Why is this a sport climb? I've never climbed it, but from the photos, it looks like it goes on gear!
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Trad Princess
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Apr 10, 2015
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Not That Into Climbing
· Joined Jan 2012
· Points: 1,175
This thread serves as yet another reminder to me, that in spite of us all loving the same thing, most climbers are annoying as hell. There's an unfortunate faction of us that live deep within the douche-bunker, or are way too sensitive/insecure, etc etc. Lulzy.
Present company excluded, of course. You guys are all fantastic.
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Ted E.
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Apr 10, 2015
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Unknown Hometown
· Joined Jul 2014
· Points: 15
Some ones I didn't see: "Girls have better technique" "You got me?" "Free-Soloing is just irresponsible." "Alex Honnold isn't even human." "That route was totally a (one grade harder)"
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NickO
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Apr 10, 2015
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West Slope
· Joined Apr 2011
· Points: 30
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Austin Baird
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Apr 10, 2015
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SLC, Utah
· Joined Apr 2009
· Points: 95
Actually, there's no climbing here in (insert state, usually Montana). You shouldn't even bother coming out.
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curt86iroc
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Apr 10, 2015
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Lakewood, CO
· Joined Dec 2014
· Points: 274
NickO wrote:On Belay fav!
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FrankPS
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Apr 10, 2015
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Atascadero, CA
· Joined Nov 2009
· Points: 276
Here's one of the oldest and most annoying posts I see here: "Yeah, that's no good. Send it to me and I'll dispose of it for you." Get some new joke material, ferchristssakes.
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Cliffhanger
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Apr 10, 2015
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Unknown Hometown
· Joined Jan 2015
· Points: 5
Blah Blah Blah, something about wearing a helmet... "Always rap from sport anchors" "Always get lowered from sport anchors" I am terrible at route finding. Is this an FA?
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rob.calm
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Apr 10, 2015
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Loveland, CO
· Joined May 2002
· Points: 630
Some epic making clichés. Dont worry. The rope will reach the ground. At the end of the second pitch of a six-pitch climb, I dont think itll rain. At the end of the second pitch of a six-pitch climb. Weve no choice but to continue. At the end of the second pitch of a six-pitch climb, Dont worry. Well top out before dark. After placing some bad gear, I knew I had to keep moving. After completing a 5.4 trad route, That was really an epic.
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Nathan Self
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Apr 10, 2015
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Louisiana
· Joined Mar 2012
· Points: 90
"I didn't read the whole post, but here's what I think...(repeats OP or others)"
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Highlander
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Apr 10, 2015
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Ouray, CO
· Joined Apr 2008
· Points: 256
Crush, crushed it, crusher, bone crusher getting on the proj Trad is Rad Aid climbing is for old fat guys Strength is overrated, it's all about technique Ice climbing is aid climbing I am from Boulder and it's rad.
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