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What works when coaching your partner

Original Post
Don McGrath · · fort collins, CO · Joined May 2008 · Points: 40

I'm considering including tips on how climbing partners can engage in co-creative coaching to help each other improve in my book, Think-Play-Send.

What has worked for you when your partner helped coach you or vice versa?

Thanks,
Don

William Sonoma · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Dec 2012 · Points: 3,550

Using facts and THEIR experience if they are going to critque, not going off of what others do or say, etc. Also an egoless environment where there is no such thing as better than or worse than, just me sharing my experience with you.

Drop the egos, negative attitudes and speak truthfully and were goodto go.

Edit: if one is getting frustrated when not understanding/seeing try explain from a different point of view. Also explain things via a story, try and EXPAND their mind (capacity) and help them see the whole of the situation so they can grow faster, smoother, more naturally.

Jared Garfield · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Oct 2011 · Points: 5

"Also an egoless environment where there is no such thing as better than or worse than, just me sharing my experience with you. Drop the egos, negative attitudes and speak truthfully and were goodto go."

+1

johnthethird · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Jan 2012 · Points: 5

Yelling 'OFF BELAY' just before they approach the crux usually motivates my partners to send.

Peter Stokes · · Them Thar Hills · Joined Apr 2009 · Points: 150

I've noticed that partners who might need some coaching are usually also a bit preoccupied with all the other stuff they think about when climbing (knots, gear, adrenaline, etc.), so I've had some success when I discuss stuff later, like over beers. Then maybe next time I'll mention what we talked about regarding a particular route or situation if it seems appropriate.

frankstoneline · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Apr 2009 · Points: 30

give em the old good cop bad cop routine. you'll need some handcuffs, a length of rubber hose and some incriminating photos. A safe word would be good too.

wait...wrong forum.

D F · · Carbondale, CO · Joined Jun 2007 · Points: 406

When in doubt keep your mouth shut, especially if it's your girlfriend struggling on the end of the rope. I've learned that my girl might take longer to figure out a sequence but if I give her a chance she usually finds beta that works for her. I try to save suggestions and critiques until we're standing next to each other unless she asks for it on route. Ultimately that helps both our confidence levels — her learning that she can figure things out on her own most of the time and me knowing she can think for herself. It's easier to trust her on multi-pitch routes, when she's below, out of sight, and I'm sure she appreciates the practiced faith in herself then, too. When it boils down, climbing is mostly a personal journey and it's good to remember that when you're tempted to tell someone how to do it.

bowshaaa · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Jan 2013 · Points: 25

I find that only giving advice/beta only when asked works the best. No one likes to be told what they're doing is wrong especially while climbing!

William Sonoma · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Dec 2012 · Points: 3,550

+1 what D Storm said about remembering climbing is in every way personal. For me this triggers annoyance at how (not training related) a lot of people (on these forums) try to state/create rules for climbing. There are no rules, rope or no rope, closely spaced gear or run out, clip the bolt or don't, climb into the 5.11, 12, 13, etc grade or don't.

Which leads me to: when working with someone, before you commented, get to know where that person wants to be, what type of climbing, how hard, how often, etc. The answers to these questions will dictate if and what I say. Maintaining the balance between comfort and uncomfort, fun and serious, part time (climber/ing) and full time (long and short sessions to include switching your routine up for spontaneity and to confuse your body, etc etc) is key.

Brian Adzima · · San Francisco · Joined Sep 2006 · Points: 560

Usually I limit advice to 'spotting' footwork and telling my partners that their feet might not be going where they think they are going. If I am going to offer advice its only when I can explain both why I think the move works, and why it may not work for them.

If by 'partners' you mean significant other, then I simply hope someone else will provide beta. Couching my wife is a lose-lose situation, my advice is always 'wrong', unless it is 'right' which is worse.

BJB · · Salt Lake City, UT · Joined Oct 2010 · Points: 195

Not exactly in the same vein as everyone's philosophical/psychological advice, but the best coaching tool I ever saw was a laser pointer used to point out holds from the ground. It made giving beta advice 100 % easier, especially with new climbers.

Adam Leedy · · Austin, TX · Joined Sep 2008 · Points: 760
BJB wrote:Not exactly in the same vein as everyone's philosophical/psychological advice, but the best coaching tool I ever saw was a laser pointer used to point out holds from the ground. It made giving beta advice 100 % easier, especially with new climbers.
You talking about that green laser Pete has?

To actually answer the question: Penalty slack when they call for a take.
Guideline #1: Don't be a jerk.

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