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In Eldo...STFU!

Petsfed 00 · · Snohomish, WA · Joined Mar 2002 · Points: 989
D-Storm wrote:Brian, I hear that in Vedauwoo, they like off-width because it's the best cleavage around. Is that true? ;)
Or you're into butts. One of the two.
sstrauss · · Denver · Joined Sep 2009 · Points: 80
Mike McHugh wrote: the motherf*cking pack raiding chipmunks have opposable thumbs and 135 IQs.
vermin!! some day I fully expect to find one in my pack when I reach in for a snack.
Helldorado · · Boulder, CO · Joined Feb 2006 · Points: 0

In eldo, idiots try to kill themselves by climbing under other parties, but usually fail.

In eldo, gomers somehow avoid fate, on the reg.

Alicia Sokolowski · · Brooklyn, NY · Joined Aug 2010 · Points: 1,781
Mike McHugh wrote:In Eldo, dogs can climb 5.7 and the motherf*cking pack raiding chipmunks have opposable thumbs and 135 IQs.
+1 to the chipmunks. Those chipmunks owned my lunch every freakin day. Just as I came off rappel and looked down, one was climbing out of the front pocket on someone's backpack with a giant chunk of sandwich. Watch when reaching into your packs!
Gregger Man · · Broomfield, CO · Joined Aug 2004 · Points: 1,759

See any honey badgers in Eldo?
I didn't think so.
Honey badger scared.

AJS · · Boulder, CO · Joined Mar 2008 · Points: 25
Mike McHugh wrote:the motherf*cking pack raiding chipmunks
I saw one of those little guys get swooped up by some giant bird once! One more good reason for raptor closures :)
Joe Huggins · · Grand Junction · Joined Oct 2001 · Points: 105
AJS wrote: I saw one of those little guys get swooped up by some giant bird once! One more good reason for raptor closures :)
"In Eldo" once, I had just rapped down the first pitch of T2 and heard a plopping sound. I looked toward the sound in time to see a Swift rolling down a slab without his head! Who took the head!?
Martin le Roux · · Superior, CO · Joined Jul 2003 · Points: 401

Clearly this thread lends itself to a haiku-writing contest. Here's a rather lame first attempt. Surely someone can do better? Syllable counts (5-7-5) will be stictly enforced.

In Eldorado
the devious cracks eject
the foolish climbers.

YDPL8S · · Santa Monica, Ca. · Joined Aug 2003 · Points: 540

Proximity is
The number of climbs there are
For hero making

(Spoken by Yoda)

Lee Smith · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Sep 2003 · Points: 1,545
Mike McHugh wrote:motherf*cking pack raiding chipmunks have opposable thumbs and 135 IQs.
The answer is here
coppolillo · · Unknown Hometown · Joined Sep 2009 · Points: 70

Don't care for Eldo?
Climb choss in Provo, pindick
We won't miss you here.

--Basho, 1687

ROC · · Denver, CO · Joined Feb 2003 · Points: 155

I've had those chipmunks destroy an entire pack. Chewed all the zippers and didn't even touch the food inside. Also been reaching into my pack and had the little suckers crawl up my arm and jump to freedom; twice! With a steady diet of power bars and organic food we've all created those little monsters.

Tony B · · Around Boulder, CO · Joined Jan 2001 · Points: 24,705
Joe Huggins wrote: "In Eldo" once, I had just rapped down the first pitch of T2 and heard a plopping sound. I looked toward the sound in time to see a Swift rolling down a slab without his head! Who took the head!?
The bird was trying to climb Scary Canary... and it scared it's fool head off. That's Eldo for you.
Tony B · · Around Boulder, CO · Joined Jan 2001 · Points: 24,705
Alicia Sokolowski wrote: +1 to the chipmunks. Those chipmunks owned my lunch every freakin day.
Cookie tins work really well to keep them off/out.
Kyle B. · · Eldorado Springs · Joined Jan 2011 · Points: 0

As an Eldo local, I can only laugh. IMO Eldo is about manning up and even getting a little scared. If you can't run with the big boys then go run to your safer spots if you want. If you think everything is too sand bagged then maybe your ego is too big. And if the holds are too greasy for you then maybe you need to think sound thoughts of dry skin and friction, grit your teeth, and go for it.
That's what the intrepid pioneers did and they put up world class routes w/o all the safety nets we use now. So stop complaining about a place as magical as Eldo and enjoy it regardless, cause yo might learn something about yourself in the process. Cause climbing is climbing.

Bill Duncan · · Glade Park, CO · Joined Mar 2005 · Points: 3,410

Another haiku:

To climb in Eldo
One must have much skill with wires
Chuck Norris climbs there

Austin Baird · · SLC, Utah · Joined Apr 2009 · Points: 95

I Live in Provo
I Don't Have Much Room To Talk
At Least I Don't Spray

Berkeley · · Boulder, CO · Joined Feb 2006 · Points: 10

If you meet three assholes in one day, you're the asshole.

Joe Huggins · · Grand Junction · Joined Oct 2001 · Points: 105
Berkeley wrote:If you meet three assholes in one day, you're the asshole.
There's true wisdom in that.

Here's my haiku

In Eldorado
I met an arrogant prick
We were much the same
Joe Huggins · · Grand Junction · Joined Oct 2001 · Points: 105
Tony B wrote: The bird was trying to climb Scary Canary... and it scared it's fool head off. That's Eldo for you.
Funny,I was trying to figure out how the bird lost its'head-did a falcon take it? I know they sometimes do have wrecks; they move like Norwegians in wingsuits. Perhaps I need to reread Jonathan Livingston Seagull
Guideline #1: Don't be a jerk.

General Climbing
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