Dumb things other climbers have said

Preface: I offered a Grigri to a climber once, she said she knows how to use a grigri but declined saying she is much safer with a tube style device...

As she lowered her boyfriend she slipped on uneven terrain and slid about 4 feet, as she came to a stop I noticed she was not holding the rope in either hand but he was still hanging in the air... (a full 10 seconds had gone by) then she looked down to notice her error and quickly grabbed the rope. When she started to lower him again he didn't move because she was standing on the rope, stopping him from taking a 40 foot ground fall... Now it gets stupid...

As he started to do the same climb again, with her standing in the same place.
Me: Here you can use my grigri this time just in case.
Her: No thanks I don't need it.
Me: Are you sure that is a good idea after his last climb?
Her: No I am fine... Besides I've never dropped anyone....
Me: How about last time when you let go of the rope and accidentally stepped on it?
Her: Hey he didn't hit the ground did he!

Climbing at Tinker Toys in Rock Canyon, Utah, there's a guy who I know is a really experienced climber climbing with this girl who says she's been rock climbing for a few years. He asks if she knows how to lead belay. "Of course," she replies nonchalantly. So, he starts leading the route.

He gets to the first bolt, and tugs on the rope, which doesn't give at all. "Slack!" he yells. "Why?" she replies...

He downclimbed pretty quick. Apparently, the girl had never lead belayed in her life. She tried to convince him to get back up and that she could figure it out, but I think they wound up top roping.

Ok just heard this twominutes ago, although not a climber a pool player. " I'm competitive but I don't care about winning"

Dumbest thing I've said, "I've totally got this climb dialed."

Right before almost wetting myself on one of my few free solos.

A young apprentice I had once:

"Do you want to carry the rope or can I?"

I was finishing up a day of climbing at Pawtuckaway State Park (NH) and the sun was headed down, dusk settling in. Some mountain bikers rode by and stopped to watch me being lowered off the last climb.

"Oh cool. Are you guys night climbing?"
"Yeah. The grade goes up when you see less features."

Do you want to try to onsight it again ?

Grassi Lakes, Alberta

spencerparkin-

I don't think you can make an ass of oneself at the "slipis" (not "lips).
That is what they are there for, that and showing how bad a scout leader can be.

"This is the most BOMBER nut ever!"

Said by a climber a few hundred feet up riiiiggghhht before he was about to rap off that sole piece. The most bomber nut EVER blew and he almost died. No lie.

Multiple comments heard during one climb from a father belaying his teenage daughter up Bath Rock in City of Rocks, ID

Father - Don't fall for a minute, I'm putting my jacket on, you're not on belay

Daughter - I'm all out of those things you put on my harness
Father - what things?
Daughter - the things I clip to the bolts but there's still like 2 or 3 left before the top
Father - Don't worry about it, just go up to the top, you'll be fine

Daughter (from the top) - So I untied from the rope but I can't remember what knot you told me to use to tie into the anchors

She was standing on an insecure ledge at the anchors not clipped or tied to anything. A nearby climber offered to climb up quickly and clip her into the anchors and the father just said, ok sure, that sounds great. She held onto the anchors till the other climber reached her. She nor her father ever seemed scared the whole time, though every other climber within earshot was on pins and needles dreading the accident we were about to witness any second.

Katie Rockwood wrote:Multiple comments heard during one climb from a father belaying his teenage daughter up Bath Rock in City of Rocks, ID Father - Don't fall for a minute, I'm putting my jacket on, you're not on belay Daughter - I'm all out of those things you put on my harness Father - what things? Daughter - the things I clip to the bolts but there's still like 2 or 3 left before the top Father - Don't worry about it, just go up to the top, you'll be fine Daughter (from the top) - So I untied from the rope but I can't remember what knot you told me to use to tie into the anchors She was standing on an insecure ledge at the anchors not clipped or tied to anything. A nearby climber offered to climb up quickly and clip her into the anchors and the father just said, ok sure, that sounds great. She held onto the anchors till the other climber reached her. She nor her father ever seemed scared the whole time, though every other climber within earshot was on pins and needles dreading the accident we were about to witness any second.

Katie Rockwood wrote:Multiple comments heard during one climb from a father belaying his teenage daughter up Bath Rock in City of Rocks, ID Father - Don't fall for a minute, I'm putting my jacket on, you're not on belay Daughter - I'm all out of those things you put on my harness Father - what things? Daughter - the things I clip to the bolts but there's still like 2 or 3 left before the top Father - Don't worry about it, just go up to the top, you'll be fine Daughter (from the top) - So I untied from the rope but I can't remember what knot you told me to use to tie into the anchors She was standing on an insecure ledge at the anchors not clipped or tied to anything. A nearby climber offered to climb up quickly and clip her into the anchors and the father just said, ok sure, that sounds great. She held onto the anchors till the other climber reached her. She nor her father ever seemed scared the whole time, though every other climber within earshot was on pins and needles dreading the accident we were about to witness any second.

Me directed towards someone rappeling with a rope that is obviously too short.

Me: hey man you should probably tie a know in the end of your rope

idiot: why?

Me: so you dont reappel of the end, that would be a bad way to end a good day.
(at this point I am weirded out)

Idiot: how could that happen?

Me: when you run out of rope you will free fall

Idiot: oh, I was wondering why people had knots in the nd of their rope.

I finished by telling him the "rules" of rappeling, but I was so scarred the whole time.

Mother and Father said with a tone of utter scorn to their 10 year old son leading a 10d at Cat Slab in Clear Creek Canyon:

"Just do it for god's sake"

He was at the crux, crying and saying he couldnt do it. Later they said he is "the next Chris Sharma".

Greg Twombly wrote:Mother and Father said with a tone of utter scorn to their 10 year old son leading a 10d at Cat Slab in Clear Creek Canyon: "Just do it for god's sake" He was at the crux, crying and saying he couldnt do it. Later they said he is "the next Chris Sharma".

Crag Dweller wrote:You should've called the department of children and family services. Seriously.

I plan on getting a lot of mileage out of this pic.

j fassett wrote:I plan on getting a lot of mileage out of this pic.

"I'm just going to solo it and set the rope up"

The guy was with a friend who hadn't climbed before and didn't know how to belay so his solution was to solo the route -with a rope hanging off him- and set up a toprope. Just as he was stepping off the deck another guy at the crag offered him a belay and he accepted. From the get-go you could tell he wasn't a person that should be soloing anything. He struggled all the way up the 5.6 and FELL 2 OR 3 TIMES. I remember the guy belaying him just kind of looking back at us with a shocked look on his face.

The Gunks, mid 1980's. One of the routes above the Carriage Road near the Uberfall. The big burley guy in the woods screaming at me: "What are you yelling at my son for?"

His son had been peeing on me from the top of the route I was leading.

John Maguire wrote: You gotta post a larger version then!