Fear of Heights and Climbing...

I never in my life thought I would climb, I have always had a VERY bad fear of heights. As it turned out I went with a friend to check out a climb I'd seen and thought he would like, I ended up getting to the summit it in the dark and I was slightly hooked.

That was three years ago and it took me two of those just to start putting faith in the gear. Now I still have a really tough time with it though I do it all the same even though every time I'm looking at anchors I swear I'm gonna die and never climb again only to get back to the ground and swear I'll never stop climbing. It's a really odd love hate type thing. What's really odd to me is the fear isn't as bad on overhung routes, once I hit the anchors it's normally better and I have a really tough time being lowered, I'd always rather clean and rap.

Just wondering about others with a fear of heights, how bad it is, what you think about when you climb and how you manage it? Also, has it gotten better or have you just learned to forget about it better?

I also started out terrified of heights. I really had to be pushed to climb anything at all and usually ended up spending more time belaying than climbing. When I did climb being lowered was definitely the worst part; I even coined a new command: lower SLOWLY!

At this point I've lost most of my irrational fear of heights. I think most of it has to do with prolonged exposure to heights. Though there was a breakthrough moment about 2 years in when my belayer refused to lower me off a climb that I had stalled out on because of fear. Maybe it was because nothing bad ended up happening or maybe it was just the hour and a half I spent in the air either way heights haven't been as bad since then. Though I don't know if I would suggest that particular method.

MHanson wrote:Though there was a breakthrough moment about 2 years in when my belayer refused to lower me off a climb that I had stalled out on because of fear. Maybe it was because nothing bad ended up happening or maybe it was just the hour and a half I spent in the air either way heights haven't been as bad since then. Though I don't know if I would suggest that particular method.

That's just what it took to get me up my first route, I had a really good friend that knew me well belaying me and he pushed me hard. Even threatened to tie me off to a tree and come back in an hour. I was so motivated to get to the top so he could lower me and I could kick his ass I finished the climb only to get down and end up hugging him.

It's odd, I see routes I know I can do and I can't wait to try but I get ten feet off the ground and from there up it's a major mental game for me.

I am the same way. My family can't believe that I am an avid climber since I have been afrad of heights my whole life. Climbing has really helped get me past it. At this point as long as I am busy (climbing) I am ok. I still get really nervous if I am not in control. Last year I climbed Kieners route on Longs Peak. My partner was leading the first technical pitch off of broadway. We were having problems route finding so it took him over an hour to do the pitch. Standing on Broadway with 800ft of air below my ass was a little much and I was pretty freaked. Once it was time for me to climb I was so flustered that I forgot to clean the anchor of 4 camalots. Nice gift to someone. Once I started leading the later pitches I was totally fine. I guess as long as I don't have time to sit around and think about it I am ok.

I think most climbers are afraid of heights and/or falling...it's a natural response, except for acrophobia. I think where the level of abilities cleave, is the overall management of that fear. How well can you control it to achieve your objective. That comes with time and practice like everyone said. That has been a huge sticking point in my climbing development as well.

my brother is 13 year, really lean and strong and would be an excellent climber. He has a crippling fear of heights, i took him toproping about 2 years ago and he broke down in tears 8 feet off the ground. I explained to him that he needs to trust the equipment, and that seems to be most people's problems.

In my own experience, I'm not overly afraid of falling, I actually kind of enjoy it, but what I am scared of is decking, which I nearly did on a sport climb last month. I think that if we trusted are gear to a reasonable extent, knowing it's limitations (though I suppose if you've seen dan osman antics, you know it's got some crazy limits), we might all be better off?

Yeah, getting comfortable with the gear is a huge thing. I have done some of my own personal test on it and it makes me feel really good so when I climb know I don't give much thought to the gear. Though I will admit to looking at anchors odd pretty often, I will get up there and inspect them like I'm a county code enforcer or something. Sometimes I swear I see them moving when I know they really aren't.

I do much better with a belayer I trust and I don't have many I trust. Otherwise I think too much, can't get in the zone and clear my head and I pump pretty bad from the fear and adrenaline which can be very frustrating on climbs that are well within my abilities.

I would like to know if anyone else has experienced this phenomena.

As long as I am on a climb that is within my range, and there are no sharp aretes or large overhangs, I only feel the exposure for the first 50 to 100 feet. Then, my internal frame of reference seems to change and looking up the wall feels like looking horizontally, almost like looking down the street. The tug of gravity of course lets me know this is not the case, and I'm not talking about overhanging routes either.

But, as soon as I come to a crux spot that I can't figure out, or slip on some bit of lichen, my internal frame of reference rotates right back 90 deg and I feel the exposure. Anybody else experience this feeling?

Edit: Nobody else seemed to have experienced this, so I can only deduce that it is a leftover symptom of early climbing on Vitamin A!

I think the rite of passage is when you lean back into your first hanging belay that is made entirely of gear that you have placed. Funny, even though you are putting less stress on it than you would falling on let's say a nut from 15 feet up, it was far more spooky for me than my first fall on gear.

Strangely enough I struggle more with single pitch climbing. It takes me a pitch or 2 to get totally comfortable. With single pitch I never quite settle into my groove...basically I'm more nervous at 40+ feet than I am at a 140+. But like Paul said, decking sits in my mind so I sew up a short climb, and run out long ones (not inclusive of length of fall).

As far as I can remember, I've never been afraid of heights. I've always kind of liked standing on the edge of high places, since I was a kid. I also love being high up on a multi-pitch route, and long, airy rappels which usually gives you awesome views of the terrain. What scares me at times, is the fear of decking onto something really hard, as we mostly climb moderate multi-pitches which has more features, which means more stuff to hit when you fall on lead. I usually trust my gear placements, especially nuts, and hexes (I love placing passive pro), but if I feel like I can't physically pull the moves (at, or above my limit), it can mess with my head. I guess climbing hard sport to dial moves, and get stronger will benefit me for my trad lead head. Sheesh, what's stopping me?! ; )

Three things that can morph me into a raging bitch is a long traverse with minimal, or no pro, and it's at, or above my limit; not fun; I curse like a sailor, and whine a bit on those (I swung out a ways on a traverse once, my fault, and once was enough- I wish I could block that SOB swing out of my mind) Second is not feeling like I pull the moves on lead (over my head), and third, sustained chimneys above 5.8 which expose my dark side to my partners. Whoa, no mystery there. : )

I can't really say I ever feel exposed on a route, except maybe on hard (for me), scary traverses where if I fell, I'd swing into oblivion, I don't know; when climbers ask me if a route has a lot of exposure, I don't really comprehend what that means sometimes. I'd maybe feel exposed if I was trapped in a deep, dark mine shaft, about to fall an unknown distance, and I couldn't see the bottom, or something as bad as that. Can someone explain what exposure, in climbing, means to them? I'm not getting it. : ) If I'm ten feet off the ground on a climb on lead, or 1,500 feet off the ground, with the exception of getting better views up high, it all feels the same to me. I don't want to fall, at all.

Now, what was the OP's question? : )

Oh, yeah, fear of heights, never; fear of decking when I feel that I'm unable to physically pull the moves, or swinging, and smacking into rock on a long traverse, again, when I am uncertain that I can pull the moves, hell yes.

I have had the issue of having less and less fear the higher up I get. It's odd, the first 30-40 feet are tough for me, after that I figure if I hit the ground I'm not gonna end up any deader so go for it and enjoy the climb.

For some reason overhung routes don't really bother me at all, maybe it's not having to worry I'm going to hit a ledge.

Also, once I tie in to the anchors I seem to be fine, rapping also doesn't bother me unless I'm dropping over an edge which really freaks me the hell out!

I climbed with a fellow 35 years ago who was afraid of heights, but wanted to climb. He was OK climbing up, but could hardly look down to place his feet on the best holds. He was OK rap'ing as long as he looked straight at his rig while descending. He was never comfortable enough to do a multipitch climb and I suspect he quit the instant we quit climbing together. Just my 2 cents.

I've had acrophobia all my life and no doubt surprised my family when I started climbing. First time up about 10 feet (no rope), I burst into tears and froze up. First time rappelling, thought I was going to die and burst into tears (I even had a fireman's belay but I didn't know what that was or what it did for me). So it was pretty weird going up the 3rd Flatiron, sitting in a bucket for a belay, looking down and out a 1000 feet. I had to ask myself: what the hell am I doing?! But I felt very safe and the feeling subsided. Later at the 2nd or 3rd rap station, there were 3 of us on a tiny ledge and despite being tied into a solid anchor 2 or 3 times, every muscle in my body was contracted while I waited for an hour (it seemed) for my turn, as though relaxing would have caused me to fall. Not! After a while I got use to trusting the gear, trusting my partners and the repeated exposure to heights tied into a rope has caused me to not be afraid of heights while climbing at all. However, there are some things that mortify and paralyze me still: I can't walk out onto balconies, bridges or overpasses. My example now is: I wouldn't walk across the Royal Gorge Bridge if you paid me but I'd rap the side of the gorge in a heartbeat (if I can see that my knotted rope reaches the bottom that is).
The OP didn't say whether or not he is TRing or leading. If it is leading, he should know everyone deals with a head game on lead. I definitely, like others, feel better the higher up I get.

rob bauer wrote:He was never comfortable enough to do a multipitch climb and I suspect he quit the instant we quit climbing together. Just my 2 cents.

Seeing my goal for climbing is to get to the top of Devil's Tower I best be getting comfortable with it!

E Johnson wrote:The OP didn't say whether or not he is TRing or leading. If it is leading, he should know everyone deals with a head game on lead. I definitely, like others, feel better the higher up I get.

I enjoyed and could relate to pretty much your entire post. To answer your question, on lead I feel about the same, I go a little slower of course, try to avoid seeing how far I am from my last bolt when I reach down for rope to clip the next.

If I can dial in and just climb I feel pretty fluid and alright, it's just hard for me to put myself in that 6 foot bubble I like.

When I'm cleaning, I feel pretty uncomfortable if there is no ledge or solid feet for me to stand on. Thinking about it now, I feel like I could run up the rock, clip in and just hang out for awhile, when it comes time to do it, different story.

What are some of you thinking while you're climbing, cleaning and so on?

As a wee lad I had a huge fear of heights, which is the reason I was initially attracted to climbing.
However, after thirty-eight years of desensitization therapy, I no longer feel the slightest discomfort with air under my knickers.

Adam Block wrote:What are some of you thinking while you're climbing, cleaning and so on?

If I'm following or TRing, I don't worry about heights at all. I get to enjoy the act of climbing! Other than the usual objective hazards (rock fall and weather), the one thing that gets my pulse going is pendulum fall potential. But that's not a heights issue. While cleaning, I'm totally focused on figuring out how to get the piece out and not dropping it. While leading, I, like everyone else, am "concerned" about being between or above my pro (and any bad fall potential like being above a ledge). I know that if I get too involved in that thinking though, I won't proceed or will climb unsafely. So if I proceed, I'm not thinking about anything but the moves I'm making and where I'm going next. That's still not related to a fear of heights; I think it's normal lead head stuff.

When I'm clipping I try to be 100% focused on maintaining my balance on my holds while I very consciously clip (correctly). I try not to do any of that distractedly. (I took a long fall on a route because I was too tired to be as sure of staying in a 2 finger pocket as I was sure of pulling up rope to clip. I pulled up the rope and then popped off. Oops!)

Another example of how acrophobia still lives: I was really scared while hiking to the bottom of a climb, a narrow trail which followed the base of the cliff with a drop off of maybe 50 feet on one side. I get to the climb, tie in and climb up 4 pitches. No fear at all. Weird.

E Johnson wrote: If I'm following or TRing, I don't worry about heights at all.

I am the opposite. If I am following I don't really feel comfortable untill I fall. I think it is becasue I am not in charge. If I am leading I worry about falling but it is not the fear of heights, its the fear of taking a whipper.

Wow, I sound like a head case!

jmac wrote: I am the opposite. If I am following I don't really feel comfortable. I think it is becasue I am not in charge.

+1
I used to think this was because I usually follow a lot harder than I can lead, but I've noticed I'm a little uncomfortable following even really easy stuff.

Hmmmm, this just made me think that I rap off every climb, I can't handle being lowered.

So a couple days ago, I'm on a 5.8 sport route, 8 bolts to the anchors. I'm going to clean so I'm not even leading the thing. Anyway, I hit the second bolt and I freak, I look down and I'm thinking forget it, I don't ever wanna climb again, I'll just come down and give up. Well, I sit there for about 30 seconds, focus on my breathing and think to myself "relax, get in the zone and go".

60 seconds later I'm at the anchors and I'm totally fine, I like it up there in fact and I chill up there for like 5 minutes taking in the view.

There's no point to this post other than I keep having to fight with this and I love climbing so I'm nothing close to giving up but I really need to get past this. EFR suggested I get The Warriors Way by Arno Ilgner, has anybody read it? Just wondering if it helped at all or what you do when you get yourself freaked.