pooping off the deck
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Q: How does one poop on a multiday climb? What are the subtleties of such a manuever? What about the ladies and peeing? Safety issues? Codes of conduct? |
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On multi-pitch climbs, I usually poop the same way I do on single pitch climbs, i.e., out of my @$$. |
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On multi-day climbs, it's standard ethic to pack your poo with you by pooing into a PVC tube or some such contraption. Peeing, you just try to pee off route and not onto people... as best you can. Same for the ladies, just a little more effort in getting the legloops and pants out of the way. |
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Wag bag and PVC tube, good luck. |
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PVC tube? What is the proper diameter? Do you want a threaded end? When you use it do you twist it in place.... er.... or do you push..... ahhhh.... |
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I've actually yet to try this, but have read about it, and would use it tomorrow if I were on a wall. Plastic bags, such as those you get from the grocery store. Gives you a nice big opening so you can't miss. Upon finishing, tie it off, stuff it down the pvc poop tube, close the lid. Keeps the tube clean. Once you get down from the wall, dump out the tube, wash it out, and you're ready to rock again. |
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You could always go with the trend for renewables & just chalk up |
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sorry, I can't take this seriously. |
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Mark Nelson wrote:You could always go with the trend for renewables & just chalk upIs that liquid chalk? |
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I think the best is go eco-friendly/biodegradable paper lunch sack, gotta have good aim for the small opening. |
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Partner's chalk bag, always good for some wholesome laffs. |
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Andrew Luke wrote:I think the best is go eco-friendly/biodegradable paper lunch sack, gotta have good aim for the small opening. Once ya got it in the bag and rolled up nice and neat then launch it at tourists with one of those water balloon slingshots. Use a spotting scope to help aim and to observe the results. The use of the sling shot allows you to hit something further from the wall than just throwing it. The impact force will provide a spectacular explosion. You should see the look on peoples faces when a big bag of shit explodes next to them. WahHahhhah (note: get a good spotting scope to see their faces) The good thing about this method is you don't have to haul it, you get it far enough off your route and other routes, and you get a great laugh if you hit something.Sorry bro, but you're way lo-tek, and i mean luddite. Laser-sights for poop sling-shots have been standard since the late 90's. Some make the necessary compensations for windage. for you guys with zero nards who insist on packing it out, i suggest a small dry bag, much lighter than the pvc tube. you can smell it either way, if you really try. maybe i just have a good nose. |
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WHen I was in eighth grade Jimmy Alison snuck into the band room and fired a stone down the gullet of Andrea Vignaroli's clarinet. We called her shit lips from then on. |
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Tico wrote: Sorry bro, but you're way lo-tek, and i mean luddite. Laser-sights for poop sling-shots have been standard since the late 90's. Some make the necessary compensations for windage.Yeah well I aint got that kind of cash, maybe when you upgrade I'll buy your old gittup. Damn, wind compensation that must be hard to calculate with such a large projectile. When do you think they will start marketing computer controlled potato guns for such a purpose? Sam, I am laughing so hard I almost craped myself, "shit lips" hahaha |
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The Larry wrote:Just stick your ass out and let the mud falcons fly.Awesome. |
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Ray- |
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one potential problem with going off the deck is the railing; if it doesn't have a good finish on it you can really splinter the hell out of your deirer; probably also get a good wallup from your s.o. with your home depot style fertilization process; but what the hey, you can do it -- we can help. |
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Ray, here's one way to do it... |
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just for the record - Deaun doesn't have |
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Mark Nelson wrote:just for the record - Deaun doesn't have the gray hair Metallica!!Metallica rules! Those old farts... Good to see you last night Mark. Sorry about stealing your beer. Not really! |